Seriously it is just about 3am and I'm writing. My best deliberations come around this time though. What can I say? I don't hate it! haha.
So I hate to state the cliché statement, but YOU GUYS! I am a SENIOR!! And boy has time the time flown. I can distinctly remember the day I moved into my freshman dorm as a first year student. I remember the awkward first encounter of meeting my first roommate! Yall, I literally went to shake his hand "Hi, i'm Ke..." and I step on one of plastics bins carrying some of my books and I almost trip. Sorry, Corey, for making a fool of myself. What a first impression. So many moments! I can sharply recall going to the crowded club fair, going to the dining hall alone on numerous occasions, the difficulty of trying to shake off my shy temperament, the harsh reality that people my age cuss much more frequently than i'm used to, the day when there was tye dying on the Great lawn, the times i often left my vital CNU id in my room, the few times when we played speed scrabble in the hall York West 2b, the times when I went to and IV small group and didn't say a word. So many wonderful and honestly, rough, moments.
I love reminiscing. And i HAVE mentioned this before but it is ever so true. But I reminisce and reflect often because for me it allows for a great sense of appreciation and love. I turn to God and simply say "wow, Jesus" . Through tough times and amazing times you were there. And look at me now. Look at the change and growth. (i hope I have matured some ;) It gives me Hope too, for the future and all that is to come in my life. With my career, with friendships, with my family. I can look back and tell myself that HE always was and is and is to come. The Lord of everything is rooting for me.
I don't want to be sad. I'm kind of going into this summer a little sad. I feel like i've lost some opportunities and I have only a year to catch up on it all. It's going to be difficult but i'm going to try my hardest to go into senior year without any expectations. I want to take whatever I encounter and make the best out of it. This is my time to not waste chances and to not hesitate and put myself out there. I have a final year in college to live it up, to love, to grow, to enjoy time with people who are just trying to get through school and life. This is it and it's coming. Senior year is at my doorstep.